Grandpas dead. I miss him so much. He is the only man that has ever been a constant in my life. Peeps broke into his house the day after his funeral and stole the only things worth anything, his tools and his coin collection. Theres always piranas.

I just need to talk or scream. I just don't feel like I am a part of this world anymore. I can't communicate with people. I don't like them. I don't like them because I don't think they love me. I don't believe in things anymore. I don't believe in unconditional love anymore. I don't believe in real friendship anymore. I don't believe your family will help you when they see you need help. I don't believe people are grateful when you do something kind for them. I believe now that people only want to be around you if you are fullfilling some need they have. Either emotionally or physically. Otherwise you are just a pain to them. I think these people will show up at your funeral and say how sad, but they won't show up at your house while you are alive and help you.
I also believe that no matter how much you love and trust someone that it won't make them love and trust you back.