Sunday, November 14, 2004

Grandpas dead. I miss him so much. He is the only man that has ever been a constant in my life. Peeps broke into his house the day after his funeral and stole the only things worth anything, his tools and his coin collection. Theres always piranas.

Friday, November 05, 2004

I just need to talk or scream. I just don't feel like I am a part of this world anymore. I can't communicate with people. I don't like them. I don't like them because I don't think they love me. I don't believe in things anymore. I don't believe in unconditional love anymore. I don't believe in real friendship anymore. I don't believe your family will help you when they see you need help. I don't believe people are grateful when you do something kind for them. I believe now that people only want to be around you if you are fullfilling some need they have. Either emotionally or physically. Otherwise you are just a pain to them. I think these people will show up at your funeral and say how sad, but they won't show up at your house while you are alive and help you.
I also believe that no matter how much you love and trust someone that it won't make them love and trust you back.